September 2014 February 2013 December 2012 • Holiday Update, from the Team at Benson & Associates October 2012 • If it ain't broke, don't fix it. I'm talking to you, Microsoft September 2012 • Microsoft to end support of Windows XP and Office 2003 June 2012 • Microsoft Unveils New tablet April 2012 • WHAT EXACTLY IS "MANAGED SERVICE"? February 2012 December 2011 • Backup and Disaster Recovery / Business Continuity Planning September 2011 • HP Notebook PC battery Pack Replacement Program - IMPORTANT SAFETY RECALL August 2011 • Reclaim your privacy settings on LinkedIn July 2011 • Electronics recycling fees are being reduced June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 • (APRIL FOOLS) - Very Important - URGENT ACTION REQUIRED! March 2011 • The end to pharmaceutical scam emails? February 2011 • MDaemon v12 - BlackBerry Edition November 2010 • Barracuda Spam and Virus Protection • Microsoft's Streetslide takes on Google Streetview October 2010 • A Few Perspectives on OpenOffice.org • The History Of The (Fake) 'Free Public WiFi' You Always See At Airports September 2010 August 2010 • Private browsing: not so private • Microsoft Releases Emergency Patch For Windows July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 • Alberta Immigrant Nominee Program March 2010 • What the heck is SEO, and does it actually work? February 2010 • Encourage Your Customers to Complain • Five Reasons to Consider Managed Service January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 • Genie Timeline Now Available • Independent Anti-Virus Field Test September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 • Benson & Associates NEW Advertisement May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009 January 2009 November 2008 August 2008 May 2008 April 2008 March 2008 February 2008 November 2007 June 2007 September 2005 August 2005 |
Buzzwords We Hate - 2012-02-08
Okay, I admit it. I do it. I’ve probably done it to you. And people are doing it right now – repeatedly and without shame. In boardrooms, cubicles and elevators all across Calgary, it’s happening at a rate of approximately 6 times per second. In fact, you probably did it within the last 10 minutes without even being aware of it. That’s right, we’re all guilty. Guilty of dropping corporate buzzwords. (Gasp! The horror!) The term “buzzword” is defined by Webster (the tv character, not the dictionary) as: “An often-used word or phrase that sounds more important than it really is, used primarily by people with low IQ’s to impress other people with low IQ’s.” Back in the Nineties, when corporate buzzwords began popping up like teenage acne, mucky-mucks used words like “methodology” and “paradigm” to bump up the syllable count (and obscurity) of their decrees. Buzzwords are to a speech what steroids are to a body builder – they bulk it up, but make it stupider. (that’s right, stupider. Google it.)
The ubiquitous nature of the buzzword in meetings and speeches spawned an underground game known as “Buzzword Bingo”. During this game, buzzwords like "incent", "proactive”, and "impactfulness” are preselected and placed on a bingo-like card in random boxes. Players sit in meetings and conferences and silently check off buzzwords as their bosses spout them; the first to fill in a complete line wins. The original conclusion of the game consisted of the winner shouting “Bingo” and subsequently looking for a new job. Now, the winner is encouraged to simply cough. To generate your own Buzzword Bingo cards, try http://lurkertech.com/buzzword-bingo/
So what are the words we hate the most? The options are endless, so I stepped up to the plate and instigated the initiative to target the critical success factors collectively as a group with an action item to leverage our value oriented culture and a paradigm shift to facilitate a win-win situation. I hope you’re on board.
Outside the box Low-hanging fruit Synergy (does anyone REALLY know what this means?) Loop me in Best of breed (Is this a dog show? Or a DOG AND PONY show – yup, put that on the list) Incentivize Mission-critical Bring to the table Value-add Actionable items Proactive Bandwidth (as a tech. company, we are authorized to use this term, but only when speaking about ACTUAL BANDWIDTH)
So we at Benson & Associates apologize for any and all previous and heretofore use of corporate buzzwords, and, on a going-forward basis, promise that it will likely happen again. Our customer-centric help desk is always ready to engage in value-added executables, so pull the trigger and keep us in the loop with any mission-critical challenges you may have. 1-877-247-1664.
|